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not for the haiku but for that terrible grammatical error…. black humor

Shortly after posting that haiku I heard the ‘chirping’ of multiple puppies from the whelping box.  It reminded me that there are little souls needing and deserving love and *full* attention.  I am in dispair about Little Girl but I know that I need to put my heart and energy into the ridiculous and amazing puppies in front of me.  I hope you forgive me for ‘breaking.’  I needed to let it all   lll   lll ll l llll l lll out.  Perhaps I don’t have the steel that it takes to be a ‘breeder.’  So be it.

Since I’m ‘letting it all out…”   I’ll never forget TinTin’s litter.  After it was all done…. TinTin was exhausted and so was I.  The puppies were nursing…all 7 of them… including Nickel.  I sat next to the whelping box with a glass of wine.   I listened to the incredible sound of puppies nursing.  It was a sound of the eons.  The sound of life.  I thought of Phil, my husband who’d died (how could it be so long)  11 years earlier.  For a split second, maybe less than that, I understood the connection of life and death.  The full circle.  I was a vibrating part of what life is all about.  The connection of everything.  I’ve never felt so at peace.

I hold on to that understanding as I say goodbye to Little Girl.  There is a beauty in life and an integral link to that beauty in death.